Monday, August 17, 2009


would anybody really think this kind of thing up? did it happen accidentally? did we pig out our way into this mess and now we need help to get out? i hope it's not a conspiracy, because if it is, whoever did it is brilliant, and evil.
get people to eat more by supersizing everything, make fast food and junk food and processed food cheaper and easier to get, advertise it all out the wazoo, and watch as people get diabetes predictably, high cholesterol and obesity become the norm, and strokes and heart attacks are commonplace. and cancer, pretty much everybody's going to get it somewhere sometime, right? now most people take at least a prescription drug or two. health care costs more and more because more and more people need to see the doctor more often and need more tests for more problems caused by more drugs and nobody seems to pay attention to the last 45 seconds of the drug commercials because they're so snowed by the promise of more hair, less weight, better attitude, less depression, better sex and they don't hear the part about your penis falling off or your anus losing control.
fast forward to the near future: people are begging for help paying for or even getting health insurance and are willing to gamble on about anything to get them out of the mess that they don't even know that they got themselves in. they want fast food, fast track healthcare when they want it and they want the drugs they want and they are blind to the reality that they have sold their healthcare souls to the drug companies and the medical walmarts of the world.

when the government offers 'cash for clunkers' but they're asking for your grandmother instead of your gas guzzler, what are you going to do?

a conspiracy? sometimes i hope so, at least that would mean we were duped instead of just greedy, lazy, and stupid.

Friday, August 14, 2009

cash for clunkers, part 2

got an email forwarded to me today...'cash for codgers'. man, i thought i'd come up with this idea myself, but once again, i've either stolen it or synthesized it from many ideas floating around in the air and in my head.
if a couple wants to have a baby and wants the government healthcare system to assist them in covering the expenses, they apply for permission and have to turn in an old person in exchange for the new baby. the exchange rate is on a sliding scale, with the highest values given to the old person with the most healthcare problems, on the most medicines, smokers, alcoholics, the obese, and republicans. the old person is taken care of with a toxic injection that guarantees that they can't be resold or their body parts reused.
i really and truly had this idea and was on my way to blogging it when i got this email. i want you to believe that, for some sick reason. but i was missing the key ingredient: exchanging the old for the new - what was i (not) thinking?
this seems orwellian, i know. but so many things that seemed so 'out there' a few years ago are now occurring on a regular basis, that i'd make sure your 'value' for exchange is pretty low as you get older, or your kids might just come visit and say, 'dad, i've been thinking...'.
talk about incentive to stay healthy! gives new meaning to the statement 'i'm worth more dead than alive'.